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29 and bald

For those of you who don’t know me–which at this early of stage of the blog is probably none of you—I am bald. My hair isn’t thinning, it’s gone. Sure I have what I like to dub “the old man ring”, but it ain’t much. Hell, the only combover I can pull off is with my ear hair.

SN: Why is it that us bald men can grow hair everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE, but the one place we want to?

I’m cool with it. My wife met me when my hair was already seriously thin, so no biggie there; and my coworkers all know me as the short, chubby, bald guy; it’s all good.

The only time I get a little annoyed is when people say I look better bald. Now they may very well be telling me the truth. But I’d rather have had the option of discovering how wonderful I looked bald without nature making me find out.

I view the whole: “But Zack, you look better bald” line the same way I feel about people who say it’s a sign of good luck if it rains on your wedding day. No it’s not. It’s just the shit people say to make you feel better about a bad situation.

Now, what’s my favorite part of being bald? It gives my wife a constant comeback:

Me: “I don’t want to do the dishes”

Her: “Shut up. You’re bald”

Me: “Your feet smell bad”

Her: “Shut up. You’re bald”

You’d have to know us, but trust me, it’s a sign of affection and I love every second of it

Categories: marriage
  1. Zinker
    January 11, 2012 at 7:03 pm

    So do the bald comments ever effect your poker playing abilities? Just curious.

  2. Tony C.
    January 11, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    agreed. I don’t care that they say I “look better bald”. Hell no, I looked better with hair, people are just used to us as bald, so therefore we look better to them, only cuz they are used to it.

  3. January 11, 2012 at 8:02 pm

    Zinker, no but my poker playing ability does.

    Tony- amen brotha.

  4. January 11, 2012 at 8:22 pm

    I don’t know if you remember when I had hair (now that I think about, the last time you probably saw me with hair was almost 15 years ago – yikes), but I agree with you. If someone tells me I look better bald then they obviously don’t remember when I had hair. Because that shit was glorious. I, too, have come to terms with my fiercely faded follicle fortitude, but still…

  5. January 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    Baldies, UNITE!

  6. Rob O'D
    January 13, 2012 at 2:51 pm

    If we could all choose options on how we looked, we’d all resemble Tom Brady or Jennifer Aniston (or celebrity hotty of choice). What a boring world…….

    • January 13, 2012 at 2:52 pm

      That would be Casey Anthony for you, right bud?

  7. Spectrum Neighbor
    February 2, 2012 at 3:52 am

    Men get their head hair gene from their MOTHERS. The fact that you are bald at such a young age probably means that your testosterone is very high. Chances are you are not tired often, get a pretty good boner, and many other positive things that go along with good T levels.

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